Saturday, November 18, 2017

I like to sin. Sinning's my favorite. Part II

"We are not here to change people’s beliefs, but rather to be that helping hand when they feel there is no one else out there for them."

This is continuation of Part I of Cece's story.

Getting to a stable mental place allowed me to start thinking about what I could do to help people in similar situations to me. When I first started looking at the exjw subreddit, it was difficult because seeing posts about situations similar to mine would bring up so many negative thoughts and emotions. However, as I was going through therapy and working on my issues, I could look at those posts and start offering support. I had been in the similar situations and I knew how it felt to be abandoned and hurt.

One amazing thing helped me put things in perspective. It was when everyone posted their selfies. I know it can be a controversial subject, but the selfie craze made me see these posters were real people: People who needed help, needed to laugh, needed to find their own truth, and just needed a community. The waking up and escape process has many stages, and I felt I was at a good place to help. I just didn’t know how to help. I would leave comments for people, but I knew that my skill with words and expressing my emotions was lacking. I would see things here and there about the Tapir Signal, but was discouraged that it seemed to be only for helping exmormons. I just didn’t see the exjws having something as organized as that, but I felt like maybe it could be something in the future.

In the meantime, I became an admin on the Exjw subreddit’s Discord server. It was amazing to see how many people just needed a place to come and have casual conversation about anything and everything. It hasn’t been that long, but amazing friendships have formed and it feels like I have a family again at times. Later down the road though, something came up about a Sparlock Signal specifically for exjws. Excitedly I applied, but was worried I would not be able to help as I’m not great with talking to people. 

I found out quickly that there is so much more to it than just talking to people. There are so many behind-the-scenes things to do. You can help program bots and websites, gather and compile resources, be on the lookout for those in need, open up your home to those in need, offer a kind word to those who are feeling down, and be there in support of each other. Those are just a few things volunteers give of their time to accomplish.

I started helping create a map of all the volunteers and looking for those in need on the subreddits. I alert volunteers about those who need immediate help or even those who just need a kind word and encouragement. One thing that appealed to me was that it was not necessary to wake people up, but instead to help those already awake or just struggling in general. We are not here to change people’s beliefs, but rather to be that helping hand when they feel there is no one else out there for them.

We have to be realistic in expectations of ourselves. We cannot help every individual, but we do our best. I know I will have my days when I am down, but on the days where I feel I can help, I want to be there to make sure that someone has the help they need. As always, whether you are having a good day or a rough day, I’m sending you all lots of internet hugs.



If you are in need of help, you can reach us here.

If you are feeling suicidal, please call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-8255 or 1-800-784-2433.

If you are LGBT+ and need to talk, please contact the LGBT National Hotline at 1-888-843-4564 or find them online here.

Know you are safe and among friends and we will do whatever we can to help.

Lastly, if you would like to be involved or volunteer, you can reach out to us here.

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